Gift Giving at Diwali

This may be a somewhat controversial post.  It's not that I'm trying to cause any trouble here, it's trying to understand Indian culture more and in particular giving gifts at Diwali.  

I'd heard on the bus and at school that during Diwali it's common to give the people who help you:  apartment building guards, garbage men and women, drivers, etc a Diwali gift.  There are about eight girls, some of whom ride my bus, who all live in the same building.  One morning ride, they chatted about how much they should give for their Diwali gifts so that each tenant would give the same amount from their building.  I get that.

I do live in a building with other ASB employees but the amount I heard they were giving, was I felt too much.  I've visited my friends' apartment buildings where guards open doors, carry items, sign you in and are awake at all times.  My building doesn't have or do those things.  It's not the cleanest.  My guards, if they are in the front of the building are usually asleep; be it 10 a.m., 2 p.m. or 10 p.m. and don't help me when I return from shopping with my arms full.

I believe that if people are helpful, then I'm more than happy to give extra.  Whether they be a rickshaw driver, delivery guy, guard, whomever, it's appreciated and I'll tip them for that extra service.

With the lack of service in my building, I decided to talk with my housekeeper Espe to get her advice as she's worked in the building a while and has worked for expats.  We started at one amount and then decided on another due to the performance.  She's honest and I asked her, "Am I being fair?"  She said I was so I felt confident with my decision.

Before I left for Diwali, I didn't connect with the building employees.  They weren't around for whatever reason.  So I anticipated having to connect with them when I returned after my trip. Yesterday they stopped by.

First the building cleaner stopped by.  She smiled and said, "Happy Diwali."  I knew this was my cue to give her my Diwali gift.  I gave the amount that we'd decided on.  She smiled and then gestured upstairs, toward my ASB colleagues apartments, opened and closed her hand to demonstrate she wanted more and that they had given her more.  I smiled and said, "Happy Diwali" again and waited.  She smiled and then walked away.

About two hours later, my building guard stopped by.  At this time I didn't have change so I told him I'd give him his gift later.  Again, I wanted to be fair.

Now here's where my background kicks in.  Being American, unless you're a child under the age of five, you just don't ask flat out for gifts.  I don't show up on my birthday to my family or friends and say, "It's my birthday," and expect gifts.  I've also lived in two other countries where I did give gifts at Christmas but again, they weren't asked for at all. So people showing up to my door at all is just different for me but I understand it's part of the culture so I wasn't put out by it.

I also haven't celebrated Diwali before.  I haven't lived in India, so I knew it'd be different here.  I wonder now if the building employees think that I'm a cheapskate.  Really it's not about that. I talked with ALOT of colleagues about how  much they were giving and it varies a lot depending on service and the number of employees in the building.  I want to be fair and give what I think it right.

I'm not sure what others have experienced in India or elsewhere but this is all new and I'm trying to take the new culture I'm living in, mix it with what I grew up learning and toss in my other experiences.  The blend isn't quite right but it's one I thought others, whether you live in Mumbai or across the globe, might learn a little from too.

Happy New Year!

Diwali Post #2.  Again, sorry about the timing being off.  This post is why I need to find a blogging host who plays nicely with my Ipad because I bring that when I travel.  Open to suggestions...

Pop.  Bang.  Honk.  Woosh.  


Honk.  Pop.  Bang.


Warmth.  Flames.  Darkness. Voices.  Light.

Goodness.

Pop. Honk.  Peace.  

Happy Diwali!

In the front garden of my hotel in Jodhpur, I'm celebrating Diwali. The Festival of Lights, the Hindu, Sikh and Jain New Year. A celebration of good over evil. A time for new beginnings and starting fresh. Gifts are exchanged. New saris are worn. Blessings are given.

The smell of the green grass is at my feet.  The bubbling fountain just steps away.  The creak of the swing is soothing.  

Three quick pops catch my attention.  

Despite all of the noise, this festival really has brought peace back into my life and reminded me of new beginnings.  I'm feeling renewed and centered and calm.  It feels quieter all around me or maybe it just seems that way being away from daily life.  

There are diyas round my door and at the top of the hotel.  On the floors are rangoli.  The marigold garlands hang between the hotel pillars.  The prayers are starting.  I hear them.  Peace seems to be holding us all tightly in her arms.  

Sparkle.  Glow.  Light.  The youngest guests and owners are twirling sparklers.  

The family that owns the hotel has invited all of the guests to join in their Diwali celebration.  

Sparklers.  Crackers.  Small fireworks.  Sweets and other treats.

Wishing you all a very Happy Diwali.  Whether it's something you celebrate or not, wishing you lots of peace and light and happiness in the new year or just to you right now.  

New Year's with a Bang

This post is the first of two Diwali posts.  I just returned from a week long Diwali break, Internet was down and I'm catching up.  The timing's not quite right but I still wanted to share so please excuse the verb tenses and timings.  

The past couple of weeks have been leading up to Diwali.  The Festival of Lights.  New Years.   Diwali officially begins on October 24th.

We are actually beginning a week long holiday to celebrate Diwali.  I've started packing and while I wait for a final load of laundry to finish and listen to bangs and pops of fireworks; it's a great time to share some of the things I've learned and ways I've celebrated already.

One bang...decorations.

Decorating with garlands.

Close-up of the garlands, photo courtesy of Kelli Thexton

Rangoli artist, photo courtesy of Aimee Martins

Kelli, Andrea, Nancy and our first Diwali at ASB

Ganesha, rangoli and diyas.

Elementary girls with bindis before they dance, photo courtesy of Aimee Martins

Demons and Kings, photo courtesy of Aimee Martins

Two bangs...an assembly.

Faculty and parent dancers, photo courtesy of Aimee Martins

The story of Ram and how he saved his wife Sita, photo courtesy of Kelli Thexton

Ram fighting the demons, photo courtesy of Aimee Martins

Good conquers evil, photo courtesy of Kelli Thexton

Three bangs...learning about lanterns.


Before I moved to India, I'd heard of Diwali but didn't know much about it at all.  Luckily, I've got my guides who've taught me lots along the way.

Last night I went with Heeru, Barbara, Andrea and Debbie to Mahim.  Another suburb of Mumbai.  Barbara and Heeru organized our visit to see lovely lanterns.

The characters reminded me of Korea.

Both sides of the street were lined with stalls.

Colorful rangoli flour

Heeru and Debbie

Heeru and Barbara with lanterns for the library

Lots of purchases.

Happy Diwali India!

I didn't wind up buying any lanterns this time round.  I did buy a rangoli template for next year though.

Outside my apartment window, it looks to me more like Christmas does outside Chicago.  There are strings of colored lights on balconies.  Lanterns also shine outside windows.

Four bangs...presents!
Diwali is also a gift giving holiday.  I didn't quite have my act together but my colleagues did.

Heeru's Diwali gifts.

I received chocolates and candles.

Sweets!

Diyas and sweets.  There were lots of commercials on t.v., ads on billboards and stores all showing everything you could buy your loved ones for Diwali.  From clothes to jewelry to cars.  It reminded me a lot of the ads on t.v. in the U.S. before X-mas.

Thanks to my teachers and friends who've made my first Diwali here very special.  Happy New Year!

One final bang.
Lately I've been reading a lot about reading and 21st century schools.  And I've learned a few things.


I realize that if people really want to know specifics about things, we can just Google them so I haven't given a lot of background in this post.  I'm leaving up to the interested parties to gather the info as I think there are lots of great sources who share it much more accurately and just plain better than I can.  You'll see there are hyperlinks throughout so learn as much or as little as you like.


Also, that this post is really long.  In a world where we point and click so quickly, posting something like this isn't kosher.  So, I'm working on shorter posts and working on changing up my blog a bit to reflect that.  Please bear with me as I make those changes as I think we'll all like this a lot more.